Today has been an ordinary day. I ate, I drank, I wrote, I read, I watched TV, I ran errands. A perfectly ordinary day, where nothing bad has happened to me. Which is a good thing, right? Ordinary is good, is safe, is secure. But what if ordinary isn’t enough?
Don’t get me wrong, an ordinary life can be a wonderful life. A life with good health, a comfortable living, and loved ones around you sounds pretty fantastic, when you remember that there’s plenty of people in the wold who aren’t lucky enough to have all those things.
But right now, ordinary is starting to feel boring and repetitive. It feels like I’m waiting for the next thing, for something more. I mean, one could argue that my life is more than ordinary right now, considering I live and work in a foreign country, and am fortunate enough to be able to travel to lots of other places. But even though I’m abroad, I’ve lived here in Hong Kong long enough for the initial excitement to have worn off. And although I get to travel a lot, it’s not like I’m doing it constantly. My day to day life has become routine and repetitive, and while I’m not facing any major problems or issues, it’s all just feeling ordinary and boring.
I want more than ordinary. Yes, I want to feel secure and comfortable (and I don’t always feel like that currently!), but I also want excitement and adventure. I don’t need every single day to be extraordinary, but I want something more, at least part of the time. Maybe that’s selfish in a way, because as I’ve said, ordinary can be pretty great most of the time, and is more than some people have, but I can’t help how I feel. Sometimes I want to fast forward to a point in my life where I am settled and comfortable and happy – but then the idea of being set in a routine for the rest of life sounds mind-numbingly dull. Lately every day has felt average, nothing remarkable on either end of the spectrum, and is that really a way to live? I am an ordinary person, but I’m seeking a more than ordinary life.
I don’t know what form my more than ordinary will take, and I don’t know what the rest of my life will look like. I want to feel stable and secure, and I want to settle back in Scotland eventually, because living as I do now, with always moving and not knowing what’s next gets to be exhausting – but I also want more than a 9-5 routine and 2.5 kids. I want days that are exciting, that have the possibility for adventure and new discoveries and surprises. I want experiences that will bring me wonderful highs – and maybe that means there’ll be lows as well, but isn’t that better than living every day somewhere in the middle?
Ordinary is great, and it is a gift that only some of us are fortunate enough to have, and a lot of the time, ordinary is enough. But this world and this life has the potential for much more than ordinary, and sometimes, I want that much more.